Tuesday, 18 March 2008

H ~ is for The Hurst

Hadrian ~ when excavations were being carried out for Roman remains in the garden of the newly acquired "Mallards House", a coin was discovered. The most minute scrutiny could not reveal any sort of image or superscription on its corroded surface: it might belong to the age of Melchizedack or Hadrian or Queen Victoria. Hadrian or Publius Aelius Hadrianus (AD 76 - 138) was Roman emperor from AD 117 to 138, the third of the Five Good Emperors. He was a stoic and epicurean philosopher. See Melchizedeck and Queen Victoria.

Hairdressers ~ see Ladies' Hairdressers and Maquillage.  
Haldane, Lord ..and Germany  ~  over dinner in Riseholme, Lucia was breaking the news as gently as she might that she and Pepino would be spending more time at the home of late Aunt Amy at 25, Brompton Square: "but it isn't the past only that we are thinking of but the present and the future. Of course our spitual home is here  - like Lord Haldane and Germany - and oh, how much we have learned at Riseholme, its lovely seriousness and its gaiety, its culture, is absorbtion in all that is worthy  in art and literature, its old customs, its simplicity."   

Liberal Imperialist and later Labour politician, lawyer and philosopher, Richard Burdon Haldane, 1st Viscount Halden  KT, M, PC, KC, FRS, FBA, FSA ( 1856-1928)  was forced to resign in 1915  as Lord Chancellor (1912-1915) because of alleged and unproven, but widely- believed , German sympathies.  The "Daily Express" under Beaverbrook publicised a claim by Professoer Onkel of Heidelberg that he had said "Germany was his spiritual home."  It appears he had said this about Professor Loetze's classroom at Goettingen, at a dinner party given by Mrs Humphrey Ward to enable him to meet some German professors in April 1913. Asquith later remarked that Haldane had been "subjected to a press campaign led by the 'Morning Post' etc of the foulest, lowest , most mendacious character fostered bythe anti-German mania." It does appear that the xenophobic campaign against him was, as pointed out by Colin Mathew,"totally misplaced."

 Hamilton, Lady Emma ~  After a morning in the public gallery at the Divorce Court enjoying the celebrated Shyton divorce case, Lucia returned to 25 Brompton Square to entertain Adele Brixton to lunch. Lucia chatted animatedly about the case and sided wholly with Babs Shyton and Lord Middlesex, affectionately known as "Woof-dog." Lucia suggested that it was "a pure and beautiful affection between Babs and Woof-dog, such as any woman, even if she was happily married might be proud to enjoy. There can be no doubt of Lord Middlesex's devotion to her, and really - I hope this does not shock you - what their relations were concerns nobody but them. George Sands and Chopin, you know. Nelson and Lady Hamilton."    
Born Amy Lyon, daughter of a blacksmith who died when she was aged two and brought up by her mother with no formal education, she later changed her name to Emma Hart. Emma, Lady Hamilton (1765-1815) married Sir William Hamilton, but was best known as the mistress of national hero Horatio, Lord Nelson and as the muse of George Romney. Fleeing to France to escape her creditors, Emma came to a sadly un-romantic end in drunken poverty in Calais, dying of amoebic dysentery. Whilst Lucia may have been sincere in her estimation of the "innocent romance" between Babs and her Woof-dog (if such a thing is not a contradiction in terms) she seems to be exaggerating to place them in the same league as national heroic and romantic icons Nelson and Lady Hamilton. See Babs Shyton,  Lord Middlesex,  Lord Nelson.

"Hamlet" ~  all the bedrooms in the achingly Elizabethan home of Lucia and Philip Lucas in Riseholme, "The Hurst" were named after plays by William Shakespeare, such as Lucia's bedroom, "Midsummer Night's Dream " and guest rooms "Othello" and "Hamlet," about which Lucia in particular was terribly keen.  See "The Hurst."

 "Hand of time, The"  ~  whilst staying with Olga Bracely in Riseholme, Lucia was surprised to hear of  the changes which had taken place since her departure to Tilling, ranging from Daisy Quantock's atheist French maid to the new deaf and dumb alphabet of Mrs Antrobus and from mixed bathing in the pleached alley at "The Hurst" to cocktail parties. Lucia added "Well, well, one must expect one's traces to be removed by the hand of time. That wonderful sonnet of Shakespeare's about it...."   
It appears that Lucia may  have had in mind Shakespeare's sonnet number 64:  
When I have seen by Time's fell hand defaced
The rich proud cost of outworn buried age;
When sometime lofty towers I see down-razed
And brass eternal slave to mortal rage;
When I have seen the hungry ocean gain
Advantage on the kingdom of the shore,
And the firm soil win of the watery main,
Increasing store with loss and loss with store;
When I have seen such interchange of state,
Or state itself confounded to decay;
Ruin hath taught me thus to ruminate,
That Time will come and take my love away.
This thought is as a death, which cannot choose
But weep to have that which it fears to lose.   
Hanky-panky ~ when it emerged at Lucia's fete in aid of the hospital that her painting and that of Georgie had been returned, rejected by the Hanging Committee, Algernon Wyse permitted himself, for the first time in the collective memory of Tilling, to use slang, "There has been some hanky-panky. That picture never came before the hanging committee". It appears certain Mr Wyse was alluding to the prime definition of the informal term "hanky-panky" to mean "dubious or suspicious behaviour" rather than the ancillary one of "illicit sexual relations."   
Hastings  ~  when  Georgie Pillson suffered  a painful attack of shingles, he grew a Van Dyk goatee, which Lucia persuaded him to retain on the basis that he resembled the distinguished and bearded Gelasius. Georgie was concerned that his beard was grey and was also persuaded by Lucia to dye it - until he was less run down  since "as you get stronger your beard will certainly get its colour back."   

Lucia advised, "Dye it Georgino. Temporarily of course,  just anticipating Nature. There's that barber in Hastings you go to.  Drive over there tomorrow."  
The town and borough of Hastings on the south coast in Sussex is twenty four miles east of the county town of Lewes and fifty three miles south east of London. It is famed for its connection with the Norman Conquest and for being a Cinque Port and tourist centre.    
Hastings Chronicle ~ local newspaper often featuring reports concerning the charitable deeds and social and cultural pre-eminence of Lucia, the chatelaine of Mallards House - much to the chagrin of Mrs Elizabeth Mapp-Flint.

Hathaway, Anne   ~  see Anne Hathaway's cottage.    
Hatred  ~  Georgie Pillson was surprised when Lucia told him she had decided to appoint Elizabeth Mapp-Flint as her Mayoress.  He commented, "I think you're being very rash.  And you and Elizabeth hate each other like poison."    
Lucia replied, "Emphatically no. I have had occasion sometimes to take her down a peg or two. I have sometimes found it necessary to thwart her. But hate? Never. Dismiss that from your mind."   
There is no record of this reassurance ever being reciprocated by Elizabeth Mapp-Flint.

Haw-hum  ~  phrase always employed by Colonel Boucher of Riseholme, before he descended into coherent speech. Thus, after he and Georgie Pillson had been cock-fighting on the floor at Olga Braceley's romp at Old Place, the Colonel remarked,"Haw hum! Never thoughtI should romp again like this. By Jove, most amusing!"  See Colonel Boucher.  
"Health in the Home" ~ when paying a casual call upon Lucia at "Grebe," Georgie was waiting for her in the drawing-room until she was dis-engaged from her morning work in the Office. He found on the table a fat volume called "Health in the Home" and saw that he could fill up his time very pleasantly with it.   
He read about shingles and decided that the author could never have come across a case as bad as his own. He was reassured that the slight cough which had troubled him lately was probably not incipient tuberculosis. He made a note of calomel, for he felt pretty sure that Foljambe's moroseness was due to liver and she might be induced to take a dose. Then he became absorbed in a chapter about mothers and the cases where a woman got into her head a mistaken idea that she was going to have a baby.On joining him, Lucia agreed that the chapter on the delusions and fantasies of middle aged women lately married was "rather interesting."   
Heaven fits the back to the burden  ~  when various guests at Lucia's dinner party were vying to promote themselves for the as-yet-unfilled post of Mayoress of Tilling, the Padre spoke up loudly for his spouse, Evie,  "Wee wifie's energy is unbounded. Often I say to her  'Spare yourself a bitty' I've said, and always she's replied, 'Heaven fits the back to the burden' quo she, and if there's more work and responsibility to be undertaken, Evie's ready for it."  
Although the words "As 'God has made the back to the burden' so the clay and coppice people make the dress to the stubs and bushes" are reported to have been written by Cobbett in the Weekly Register in 1822, the  line "Heaven suits the back to the burden"  appears  in "Nicholas Nickleby" by Charles Dickens of 1839. It is not clear whether the Bartletts were quoting from Dickens, scripture or a proverb.

Helen, la belle Helene ~ former romantic association of Major Flint mentioned in bibulous late night amorous reminiscence with Captain Puffin. He apparently saw her off at the Apollo Bunder on the deck of the P & O at Bombay - not to be confused with another devilish fine woman who went up to the hills next morning, which was the last Benjamin Flint ever saw of her.

Helena Herman ~ a former male impersonator in the music hall who became Lady Deal on marriage. Inadvisably relying upon her particularly venerable and outdated copy of the Peerage, Miss Mapp mistook the current very prominent and respectable Lady Florence Deal, who had a summer lease on the house Suntrap in Tilling as the former male impersonator and rudely snubbed her - to general amusement.

Henley ~  whilst Lucia was enjoying her season in London, based at 25 Brompton Square, the former home of Pepino's late Aunt Amy, she had no contact with Riseholme, but had been seen here, there and everywhere in London: Hermione (in the 'Evening Gazette' ) had observed her chatting in the Park with friends, sitting with her friends in her box at the opera, shopping in Bond Street, watching polo (why, she did not know a horse from a cow!) at Hurlingham, and even in a punt at Henley.

Standing on the Thames in South Oxfordshire, Henley-on-Thames is famed as a centre for rowing. Each summer high society gathers for the Henley Royal Regatta held on "Henley Reach."  No detailed knowledge of the sport is required to enjoy the occasion and Lucia would have been amply qualified to do so. See "Evening Gazette", Hermione, Stephen Merriall and Hurlingham.

"Henry VIII"  ~  Lucia had arranged to see the first night  of "Henry VIII" in London, but on short notice was invited to dine that evening by Marcia, Duchess of Whitby. It was a last moment invitation and there was no great compliment in it :  somebody had thrown her over and perhaps that made them thirteen. Lucia instantly accepted the invitation and, almost as instantly, arranged for Aggie Sandeman to accompany Pepino to the play. Lucia was gratified: Pepino would have somebody more exciting to talk to than his poor old sposa, dearest Aggie would get her play and Marcia would be ever so grateful to Lucia (who would miss the play, but would go another night, unless Pepino told her it was no good.)

"The Famous History of the Life of King Henry the Eighth" by William Shakespeare (allegedly in collaboration with, or revised by, John Fletcher) addresses the life of King Henry VIII  of England.  The play appears under the title "Henry VIII" in the First Folio of 1623  and in previous contemporary documents is referred to under the alternative title of  "All is True".  It is generally dated to 1613 when, during one of its earliest known performances, on 29 June, a canon shot, used for special effects, set fire to the thatched roof and beams of the Globe Theatre, burning it down.  Most critics regards it as characteristic of the late romances in structure and to have more stage directions than any other play by Shakespeare. We are not told whether the theatre escaped unscathed from the performance attended by Pepino and Aggie or if Lucia ever managed to find time to see the production in question.    See Aggie Sandeman and Marcia Whitby.

Hermes ~ the early part of Lucia's garden party at "The Hurst" had not gone well: the Guru had taken refuge in his bedroom to avoid being seen by Lady Ambermere who in turn had left early in what must be  called  "a huff" and, disappointingly, Olga Bracely had still not yet arrived. What with the Guru presumably meditating upstairs and with Olga Bracely most conspicuously absent, Lucia had hardly nervous energy left to wonder what could have become of Georgie. Never in all the years of his ministry had he failed to be at her elbow during the entire duration of her garden parties, flying about on her errands like a tripping Hermes, and herding her flocks if she wanted them in one part of her garden rather than another, like a sagacious sheep dog, and coming back to heel again ready for further tasks.  
An Olympian god in Greek mythology, Hermes, the son of Zeus and the Pleiade Maia, is messenger of the gods - identified with the Roman god Mercury - sharing his role with Iris. He is the patron of boundaries and travellers who cross them, and also of shepherds,  the cunning of thieves, orators, poets, athletics, weights and measures, invention and of commerce generally - an eclectic portfolio likely to appeal to the many-faceted Georgie Pillson.  
Hermione ~ pen name of society columnist Stephen Merriall in the Evening Gazette. His column entitled Five o' clock Chit Chat featured very regular accounts of all Lucia's activities during the London season ranging from openings and exhibitions to parties, balls, dinners and the opera - to the irritation of the friends left behind in Riseholme.    
Described by Aggie Sandeman as "Just one of the men who go out to tea every day - one of the unattached," and by  Tony Limpsfield as, " Oh, you always see him handing out the buns at tea parties. He's irrelevant too."  Adele Brixton once very unkindly asked of him, "And who was the man who looked as if he had been labelled 'Man' by mistake when he was born , and ought to have been labelled 'Lady'? I never saw such a perfect lady, though I only know him as Stephen at present."

Tall, slim and middle aged, he had thick auburn hair and waved his hands when he talked - not entirely unlike Georgie. He wore Oxford trousers and a little cape also not entirely unlike those favoured by Georgie. Observation of Mr Merriall naturally prompted in Georgie an immediate deep distrust. Georgie was particularly disturbed when Olga Bracely, in fun, suggested that such a man was his double.     
Wishing to attain the cachet of being thought to have a lover, Lucia engineered a wholly false impression that her entirely innocent acquaintance with Stephen Merriall amounted to an illicit affair. This was fully appreciated and observed with pleasure by the dedicated band of Luciaphils.

Visited Lucia and Pepino for a weekend party at The Hurst in Riseholme with other friends including Sophy Alingsby and Tony Limpsfield.

Also, was a late substitute when Pepino was incapacitated by illness, at a grand end-of-season house party held by Adele Brixton. During the weekend Lucia perpetuated the wholly false impression of her faux affaire with Stephen. This came to an unfortunate climax when, late one evening, entirely innocently, Lucia walked into his bedroom, which adjoined her own, to find him shocked and horrified in fetching honey-coloured pyjamas. This traumatic event appears to have terminated their non-existent ardour in perpetuity. Marcia Whitby had been correct in asserting to Adele Brixton that "Her lover isn't her lover. He's just a stunt." Lucia, in truth, had no lover, but only the wraith of a lover, on whom no direct light must ever be flashed.      
Hermione Pillson, Hermy ~ sister of Georgie and Ursula Pillson. Both sisters were plain, strapping and hearty and apparently sounded not like a she but a he. They adored otter hunting and Georgie observed that Hermy could be very sarcastic when not otter hunting - as in August when it was not possible. They also liked pigs, dogs and mutton chops. As such, they were rather a discordant element in Riseholme.

Hermy and Ursy enjoyed golf, stunts such as cycling down from town for a lark, their lean Irish terrier Tiptree and testing the patience of their indulgent brother Georgie.

In addition they were at times rather too forward with Georgie's loyal staff, referring to his handsome chauffeur as Dickie-bird and the estimable Foljambe as an iceberg and even Fol-de-rol-de-ray. Once, they mistakenly subjected her to a booby trap of mixed biscuits and Brazil nuts intended for Georgie. Naturally Foljambe rose above the indignity with inpenetrable calm.

Unlike the creme de Riseholme, Hermy and Ursy did not join in the Guruism promoted by Lucia that reigned supreme in the village throughout that August; in fact, ignoring the guru, they pronounced the whole thing piffle and enjoyed disrupting Georgie's mono-pedal practice on the lawn with discordant cries of Om!

Ultimately, it was Hermy and Ursy who eventually saw and recognised the guru as a hard-drinking curry-cook from the Calcutta Restaurant in Bedford Street and advised that he came from Madras, but was no more a Brahmin than Foljambe. Contrary to their initial plan to reveal all and humiliate Lucia, Georgie persuaded his sisters to leave next morning without publicising the guru's deception.

Heynes's ~ the wool shop in Tilling which innocently sold some rose madder worsted ordered by Elizabeth Mapp to Diva Plaistow, an error which gave rise to lengthy and disproportionate recriminations.

High Street ~ the narrow main thoroughfare in Tilling in which shops were located and much of the social intercourse of the town took place during marketing hours.The conventional opening gambit in such discussions in Tilling was "Any news?"         
"Hittopopamus!"  ~  when Major Benjy and Captain Flint were enjoying a particularly bibulous evening together, a disagreement grew up over the Captain's resentment of the disproportionate amount of his whisky he felt was being consumed by Major Flint. This came to be known as "the hippopotamus quarrel" and "culminated in the challenge" to a duel "and all the shining sequel."  During the memorable encounter, Major Flint exclaimed, "Well, if you can drink that and say hippopotamus afterwards, I should put that among your challenges, to men of four hundred and two: I should say forty two. It's a fine thing to have a strong head, though if I drank what you've got in your glass, I should be tipsy, sir."

Later, when the drunken dispute had escalated further , Major Flint exclaimed "An' if it wasn't for the sacred claims of hospitality, I'd make you explain just what you meant by that and make you eat your words. 'Pologize, in fact"

Puffin finished his glass at a gulp, and rose to his feet, saying"'Pologies be blowed. Hittopopamus!"   

See  Sporting challenges.    
Hitler, Adolf ~ Lucia advised Georgie that she had decided to take profits from her tobacco shares and stop her financial career for the present. She cited the continual strain :"it keeps me on the stretch always watching the markets and estimating the effect of political disturbances. The Polish Corridor, Hitler, Geneva, the new American President. I shall close my ledgers."

Austrian born, Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945) leader of the National Socialist German Workers Party was Chancellor of Germany from 1933 to 1945 and head of state after 1934. By the time in which Lucia's Progress was set, Hitler had become leader of his Nazi Party, led the failed Beer Hall Putsch in Munich in 1923, been imprisoned, written "Mein Kampf" expounding his extreme views and was on the verge of becoming Chancellor and bringing calamity to the world: some political disturbance indeed. See Polish Corridor, Geneva and the new American President.

Hitum ~ the highest echelon in Riseholme's dress code: one's very best dress, the smartest, newest of all, as though for a resplendent party. For gentlemen it implied white tie and tail coat (see Titum and Scrub)    
Hoarding  ~   Elizabeth Mapp had teased Diva Plaistow over the issues of hoarding coal and food in revenge for the perceived slight of Diva's purchase of "her rose madder worsted" from Heynes's, the wool shop.  Though Diva protested that she thought, "all those orders were only for the period of the war",  Miss Mapp worried her by remarking, "I think you'll find the regulations against hoarding are quite as severe as they ever were. Food hoarding too."   

Diva's later inquiry of Mr Wootten the coal merchant showed that Miss Mapp was more than amply stocked herself, "Diva's mind blazed with conjecture that Elizabeth was hoarding  food as well."    
Fred goes on to derive great comic value from the discovery of Miss Mapp's hoard of tinned and dry goods when they cascaded out onto her guests from the false bookcase/cupboard in the Garden Room at "Mallards."

The issue or rationing and penalties for hoarding food and fuel during the First World War was still a bone of contention and fresh in the popular memory in the following decade. As with so much of the Mapp and Lucia canon, it seems that Fred is also enjoying poking fun at his frequent target, the popular novelist and part-model for Lucia, Marie Corelli.  In the autumn of 1917, after a bumper harvest of fruit from the orchard, Marie asked Thomas Lipton for some sugar for  preserving and to get around the sugar shortage and rationing. She was accused of food hoarding and summarily convicted in the local magistrates court  on 2nd January 1918, apparently without taking account of contrary evidence from her staff. The press exulted when Marie was convicted and fined £50 plus 20 guineas costs.   See Isabel Poppit

Holroyd, Mr ~ Georgie Pillson's hairdresser - particularly skillful in the fitting of his toupet and regular dying of hair to the required delicate shade of auburn.    
"Home is the sailor, home from the sea..."  ~  On occasion, Georgie Pillson's sartorial taste could be described as "cutting edge," as when he sported Oxford trousers, which were, to say the least, of exceptionally generous proportions.  These forays sometimes exposed him to the irreverence of his friends and neighbours. Robert Quantock in Risholme was predisposed to be sarcastic, so much so that it almost amounted to a gift.  On first seeing  Georgie outlandishly - and, it must be admitted, somewhat nautically - attired, Robert  danced a satirical hornpipe. Later, when the offending garment had been cut down to more normal proportions, he exclaimed, "Home is the sailor, home from the sea."    

In Tilling, Georgie was also apt to go out with more than a hint of seafaring about his costume, as befitted someone who  had recently spent so much time on the pier at Folkstone. He had a very nautical cap, with a black shining brim, a dark blue  double breasted coat, white trousers and smart canvas shoes: really he might have been supposed to have come up to Tilling in his yacht and landed to see the town.  On this occasion Georgie's Nemesis in the field of sarcasm was Quaint Irene Coles, who issued a piercing whistle and yelled,   "Avast there Georgie. Home is the sailor, home from the sea."    

The lines quoted in Riseholme and Tilling came first from Robert Louis Stevenson (1854-1894) who in "Requiem" wrote:   
"UNDER the wide and starry sky
Dig the grave and let me lie:
Glad did I live and gladly die,
And I laid me down with a will.

This be the verse you 'grave for me:
Here he lies where he long'd to be;
Home is the sailor, home from the sea,
And the hunter home from the hill."    
Later, as a tribute to Stevenson, referred to as "RLS," A.E.Hausman wrote:  
"XXII - R.L.S.

Home is the sailor, home from sea:
Her far-borne canvas furled
The ship pours shining on the quay
The plunder of the world.

Home is the hunter from the hill:
Fast in the boundless snare
All flesh lies taken at his will
And every fowl of air.

'Tis evening on the moorland free,
The starlit wave is still:
Home is the sailor from the sea,
The hunter from the hill."   
See Stevenson, Oxford trousers and Georgie Pillson.   
Homer ~ when Lucia was taking Georgie to recuperate from his bout of shingles covertly at "Grebe" she looked from the motor car and remarked, "My dear, the sun glinting on the sea! Is that what Homer - or was it Aeschylus - meant by the numberless laughter of the ocean? An immortal phrase."

The line in question came not from Homer but from "Prometheus Unbound" by Aeschylus. Homer was a legendary Greek epic poet who wrote the Iliad and the Odyssey. There appears to be no reliable biographical information about Homer surviving from classical antiquity, although there seems to be scholarly consensus that the Iliad and the Odyssey date from the end of the 9th century BC or from the 8th. See Aeschylus.

Honeymoons ~ marriages between the young and indeed those past the first flush of youth were not uncommon in Riseholme or Tilling. Thus Jane Weston married Jacob Boucher and within the hour their servants Elizabeth and Atkinson also entered Holy Matrimony. Their destinations on honeymoon - if any - are unknown.   
In Tilling, Susan Poppit married Algernon Wyse (of the Wyses of Whitchurch). Following the wedding the happy couple went, with Mrs Wyse's daughter Isabel, for a motor tour of the Continent in the Royce, no doubt planning to go as far south as Capri to stay with Algernon's sister and brother-in-law Amelia and Cecco, the Contessa and Cont di Faraglione.

Following their marriage, Elizabeth and Benjamin Mapp-Flint honeymooned in Monte Carlo where they stayed in a pension and daringly gambled successfully at the Casino.

Emmeline and Georgie Pillson honeymooned discreetly at Olga Bracely's Old Place in their former home village of Riseholme in the Midlands.

The nuptials of Foljambe and Cadman were conducted from the bride's home, but we do not know if or where the happy couple honeymooned.

Hopkins, Mr ~ fishmonger in Tilling and occasional model (au naturel save for little bathing drawers, noted on one occasion with extreme embarrassment by Miss Mapp) of local artist, Quaint Irene Coles. His most notable role was as Adam. Walking out with Miss Mapp's parlour maid, Withers.     
The morning after Major Flint's bibulous challenge to Captain Puffin to a duel, it was Mr Hopkins who saw them both return to their homes. When she heard this from the Padre, Miss Mapp remarked, "I shouldn't trust that man too much. Hopkins may not be teling the truth. I have no great opinion of his moral standard." Miss Mapp did not elaborate further or touch upon the question of her feelings regarding Hopkins' recent nudity.   
Horace ~ on her safe return form the Gallagher Bank , Lucia immersed herself in many worthy activities, including the study of Aristophanes, Virgil and Horace with the help of a crib. Quintus Horatius Flacchus, known in English as Horace (65 - 8 BC) was the leading Roman lyric poet during the time of Augustus. Acquainted with Varius and Virgil. His works included Satires and Odes.

When relations between Lucia and Elizabeth Mapp-Flint had returned to the usual heavily armed ceasefire after the open warfare of their unsuccessful campaigns in the local elections, Lucia immersed herself in managing her portfolio of investments following the model of the late Dame Catherine Winterglass and the recommendations of her astute broker, Mammoncash. She was pleased to accept Georgie's invitation to bridge, saying, "Yes Georgie, I will come with pleasure this afternoon for the most industrious must have their remissions. How wonderfully Horace puts it  "Non semper arcum tendit Apollo". I would give anything to have known Horace. Terse and witty and wise."

In noting that "Apollo does not always keep a bent bow," Lucia was immodestly admitting that even a personage of her godlike brilliance - and capacity to make "pots of money" - could afford to take a break sometimes.  See Elzevir Horace and "Monumentum oere perennius".   
Hornbeam ~ the thick hedge at the front of "Grebe" was of hornbeam (Carpinus betulus), a hardy native similar to Green Beech with mid green leaves, suitable for heavy wet soils and frost pockets. Shade tolerant, it produced green catkins from late Spring, turning to clusters of winged fruit in the Autumn, providing food for wildlife. Surprisingly, considering the location of "Grebe" adjacent to the sea, some plantsmen do not recommend hornbeam for coastal areas. The hornbeam hedge at "Grebe" was sufficiently dense to obscure the considerable bulk of Miss Mapp when loitering outside "Grebe" with intent to enter without authority to filch Lucia's recipe for Lobster a la Riseholme.

When Elizabeth Mapp-Flint came to be the owner of "Grebe, " she let it one summer to the eccentric vegetarian widow of a Baronet who kept 47 canaries and was seen by Diva Plaistow kneeling in the garden clad in a burnous, prostrating herself in an eastward position. Much disturbed, Elizabeth spent an hour on three consecutive afternoons hiding behind the hornbeam hedge spying upon her tenant.    
Hornbridge  ~  When the Mapp-Flints entertained their summer tenant of Grebe, Miss Leg, the novelist Rudolph da Vinci, to dinner at The Parsonage, they served middle cut of salmon sent over from Hornbridge.  
Hospital fete ~ during her summer lease of Mallards, Lucia thought it would be appropriate to do something to benefit the locality and graciously agreed to hold a fete in aid of the local hospital in the garden at Mallards.    
On hearing of the proposal, Miss Mapp was horrified and hurried to Mallards to forbid the proposal. Such was her haste to enter that she pushed so hard on the front door which had been specifically chained to bar her unannounced admittance that the chain and hasp broke and the door flew open. Miss Mapp blamed the effect of rust, but on subsequent inspection none was found.

After an exchange that contrived to be both frosty and heated, it became apparent that Lucia would not acquiesce to Miss Mapp's complaints regarding the rag, tag and bob-tail of Tilling passing through her hall and sweet little sitting room, soiling her carpets, trampling her flower beds and filching her possessions after stealing upstairs. The debate descended somewhat when Miss Mapp accused Lucia of intending to hire a menagerie and have an exhibition of tigers and sharks in the garden room.

Despite inquiry of her solicitor, Miss Mapp found no way of preventing her tenant from hosting the fete at Mallards

After this unpleasantness the fete went ahead and even Miss Mapp paid the required half crown on entrance.

The fete featured tableaux with Major Benjy as King Cophetua and culminated in Lucia as Queen Elizabeth knighting Georgie as Drake. There were also glees from the choir interposed between the tableaux and Quaint Irene dressed as a sailor recited a most amusing pastiche of the Boy Stood on the Burning Deck.

Attendees included what Miss Mapp considered those dreadful old wretches from the workhouse, snuffy old things, some of them smoking pipes on her lawn and scattering matches.

Her discomfiture was increased by the threat posed by the choristers to the figs and other fruit in her garden.

For Miss Mapp an uncomfortable day climaxed when Mr Wyse complimented Lucia upon her watercolour of Mallards Cottage with the crooked chimney commenting that it would have graced Tilling's Art Exhibition.

It emerged that it had been submitted to the hanging committee, but returned. Although Mr Wyse recognised that There has been some hanky panky, the return of Lucia and Georgie's submissions was treated as an oversight and arrangements were promptly made to display their works.

Lucia and Georgie knew however that there had been no accident; they held the rejection slips issued by Miss Mapp which conclusively proved that she had deliberately rejected their paintings. They would be kept for future use, if necessary.

"Hosts of Midian 'who prowled and prowled around'" ~ when Lucia felt most embattled over the universal doubts in Tilling over her acquaintanceship with Poppy, Duchess of Sheffield, she spent the weekend alone in "Mallards House" whilst Georgie was away at Olga's house party at Le Touquet.

Making a brave face of her social tribulations, Lucia attended church on Sunday morning and sang very loud in the hymns and psalms. After the service seeing Elizabeth and other friends, Lucia felt irresistibly reminded of the hymn she had just been singing about the hosts of Midian 'who prowled and prowled around'...so much the worse for the hosts of Midian.

The hymn in question is "Christian, dost thou see them" which contains the lines: "Christian, dost thou see them/On the holy ground?/How the troops of Midian /Prowl and prowl around?/Christian up and smite them,/Counting gain but loss;/Smite them by the merit/ Of the holy cross."

It first appeared in Hymns of the Eastern Church (1862) by J M Neale and was first published for congregational use in his Parish Hymn book (1863).

"Hounds of spring"  ~  About a year after the death of her husband, Lucia was showing signs of recovery "The hounds of spring were on the winter traces of her widowhood and snapped up every fragment of it,  and indeed spring seemed truly to have returned  to her, so various  and so multi-coloured were the blossoms that were unfolding.  Never at all had Riseholme seen Lucia in finer artistic and intellectual fettle, and it was a long time since she had looked so gay.  The world, or at any rate Riseholme, which at Riseholme came to much the same thing, had become her parish again."

Here, somewhat typically, given his classical and literary inclinations, Benson is quoting from the Chorus from "Atalanta in Calydon" by Algernon Charles Swinburne (1837-1909).  Written in 1865, the poem recreated in modern verse an ancient Greek tragedy focusing on youth and innocent love  
"WHEN the hounds of spring are on winter's traces,
The mother of months in meadow or plain
Fills the shadows and windy places
With lisp of leaves and ripple of rain;
And the brown bright nightingale amorous
Is half assuaged for Itylus,
For the Thracian ships and the foreign faces.
The tongueless vigil, and all the pain."  
Housewife of Anak  ~  in the normal course of Major Flint's convivial evenings with his friend Captain Puffin, athletic, amatory and other topics would be addressed and many beverages enjoyed. Late-on, after Major Flint had dispatched some five small glasses of  whisky (equivalent, as he bitterly observed, to one in pre-war days), as he measured his next with extreme care and a slight jerky  movement,  he would announce it as being his nightcap, though you would have thought he had plenty of nightcaps on already.  

Puffin correspondingly took a thimbleful more  (the thimble apparently belonging to some housewife of Anak), and after another half hour of sudden single snores and startings awake again, of pipes frequently lit and immediately going out, the guest, still perfectly capable of coherent speech and voluntary motion in the required direction, would stumble across the dark cobbles to his house, and doors would be very carefully closed for fear of attracting the attention of the lady who at this period in the evening was usually known as "Old Mappy."    
Benson's reference again has a biblical source. Anak, a forefather of the Anakites or Anakim, is mentioned in the Book of Numbers, during the conquest of Canaan by the Israelites. Etymologically, Anak means long necked and  the Anakites appear to be considered strong and tall and also a mixed race of giant people, descendants of the Nephilim (Numbers 13:33.)  When Moses sent twelve spies to scout out the  land of Canaan, they entered the Negev desert and travelled north through the Judean hills, arriving a the brook of Eschcol near Hebron, where they came across a land flowing with milk and honey, occupied by the Sheshai, Ahiman and Talmai, the sons of Anak. The scouts reported back that these men were taller and stronger than the Israelites and that they felt like grasshoppers in the presence of the sons of Anak. In the light of the biblically acknowledged super-sized proportions of the Anakites, it seems that the thimble belonging to some substantial  housewife of Akon might indeed be expected to be extra large and Captain Puffin's tot of  whisky correspondingly generous.  It is not recorded if the thimbles of the tailors of Akon matched those of its housewives, assuming of course that the tailors existed at that time - and, indeed, used thimbles.  
"How happy could I be with either, were t'other dear charmer away" ~ Georgie lunched with Lucia the day after Olga Bracely's first romp at "Old Place" and listened to numerous criticisms by his oldest best friend of the evening hosted by his newest best friend. Georgie now began to feel himself able to sympathize with that surfeited swain who thought how happy he could be with either were t'other dear charmer away.     
This is a  quotation from "The Beggar's Opera" Act ii, scene 2 by John Gay (1685 - 1732): How happy could I be with either, were t'other dear charmer away.  
"How you all work me! " ~ if Lucia had ever admitted to anything so vulgar as a catch phrase, this would perhaps be it. Uttered plaintively by Lucia when acceding to a general demand that she shoulder a massive burden for the common good - as when reluctantly consenting to direct, produce and take the lead in Riseholme's Elizabethan pageant in place of the overwhelmed and incompetent Daisy Quantock. In reality Lucia often eagerly anticipated or even engineered the call to assist and was invariably more than pleased to "try to help you if I can."   
When Lady Ambermere had claimed the disproportionate sum of £50 compensation for the loss of Queen Charlotte's mittens in the conflagration which sadly consumed Riseholme Museum, Georgie asked for help and Lucia responded," I'll draft a little letter for your Committee to Lady Ambermere. How you bully me and work me to death! Why, only yesterday I said to Pepino that those months we spent in London seemed a holiday compared to what I have to do here. Dear old Riseholme! I'm sure I'm very glad to help it out of its little holes."    
The phrase reared its head again at one of Lucia's interminable po di musicas when, after the Moonlight Sonata and innumerable movements by Mozart, Lucia managed to give the false impression that she was being forced by fervent demand from her weary audience to give them the further treat of "a fugue by Bach - if you insist on it, and if Georgie will promise not to scold me if I break down" (which luckily, amid suppressed sighs of relief, she promptly did.)

When social life in Tilling had comprehensively ground to a halt following recriminations over Major Benjy's indiscretions at the dinner party of Susan and Algernon Wyse, Diva visited Lucia to implore her to break the impasse saying, "We shall never get together unless you come to the rescue." Sighing, Lucia responded, "Dear Diva, how you all work me, and come to me when there's trouble. But I'm very obedient. Tell me what you want me to do."

By holding one of her "simple little parties al fresco, here some evening" the impasse was resolved until the next one. See Agape and Queen Charlotte's mittens.   
Humble pie ~ when Daisy Quantock realised that the workload involved in the upkeep of her garden in Riseholme was too much for her "she thought that pehaps it would be better to eat humble  pie and get Simkinson to return."

To eat humble pie means to behave humbly or be humiliated, as in to admit one was wrong.  Originally it was a pie often made from offal, such as the heart and entrails of a deer. An Umble pie was by mistaken word division from numbles, the offal of a deer, from the Old French nombles, ultimately from Latin, lumbulus, a little loin.

"Humour in Furniture" ~ memorable essay written and read by Lucia to the Riseholme Literary Society. Quaintnesses were alluded to such as a brass milk-can serving as a receptacle for walking sticks and umbrellas, a dish of deceivingly realistic stone fruit and a furry Japanese spider in a silk web of fearful verisimilitude, sufficient to induce flight in a new housemaid. Lucia hoped that such whimsicalities might allow for a sequel on "Gambits of Conversation derived from Furniture."  See Copenhagen china.   
Hurlingham  ~ whilst Lucia was enjoying her season in London based at 25 Brompton Square, following the sad demise of Pepino's Aunt Amy, nothing whatever was known of her back home in Riseholme, except what was accessible to anybody who spent a penny on the 'Evening Gazette'. She had written to nobody, she had given no sign of any sort, and, but for the 'Evening Gazette', she might as far as Riseholme was concerned, be dead. But the 'Evening Gazette' showed that she was alive, painfully alive in fact, if Hermione could be trusted. She had been seen here, there and everywhere in London: Hermione had observed her chatting in the Park with friends, sitting with her friends in her box at the opera, shopping in Bond Street, watching polo (why, she did not know a horse from a cow!) at Hurlingham , and even in a punt at Henley.   
Established in the late 1860's as an agreeable country resort, The Hurlingham Club was until the Second World War the headquarters of polo for the British Empire and the scene of major competitions, notably the Westchester cup  matches between England the the US. Polo was a fashionable diversion for London society during its Season and it is is hardly surprising that, despite her ignorance of matters equine,  Lucia should be tempted to be seen to grace its manicured lawns for a chukka or two whilst in town. See "Evening Gazette", Hermione, Stephen Merriall and Henley.     
"Hurst, The" ~ Elizabethan home close to the Green in the Elizabethan village of Riseholme in Worcestershire of Mr Philip Lucas and his wife Emmeline or Lucia. The Hurst stood at the end of the village, half a mile from the station.  As befitted its chatelaine , "The Hurst" was the most Elizabethanly complete abode in Riseholme.

It comprised three former cottages combined with a new wing added at right angles at the back which was, if anything, a shade more blatantly Elizabethan than the stem onto which it was grafted. It presented a charmingly irregular and picturesque front with two parts grey stone of the district and a middle one of brick and timber. The front door was newly made from oak planks from a dismantled barn studded with large iron nails artlessly arranged in an antique pattern to spell "AD1603".

Over the door hung an old inn sign with the swinging sign replaced by a lantern and electric light. The unmanageably heavy iron bell pull ending in a mermaid was rendered more convenient by electrification and the addition of a discreet bone button at the back of the tail.

Internally, The Hurst featured every authentic Elizabethan inconvenience from low beams and opaque gloom-inducing window glass to heavy wooden furniture and rush matting on certain floors. Its rooms, such as bedrooms Othello and Hamlet, were all named after Shakespeare's plays. See Perdita's Garden, Perdita's Border.

Hurtacombe, Lord ~ subject of a caricature by Herbert Alton shown at the exhibition at the Rutland Gallery in London attended by Lucia.   
Huth, Karl  ~  treasured precious objects inherited years ago and kept by Georgie Pillson in a glass-topped case and cleaned regularly and personally only by him. They included a gold Louis XVI snuff box, miniature by Karl Huth, silver toy porringer of the time of Queen Anne, a piece of Bow china and an enamelled cigarette- case by Faberge. It was generally understood that he had inherited them (though the inheritance had passed to him through the medium of curiosity shops) and there were several pieces of considerable value among them.

It would appear that Karl Huth was recognised as an accomplished painter of miniature portraits. He is referred to in the opening lines of a  poem "An Ivory Miniature" by Arthur Grissom, as such: "If Karl Huth wrought of old with greater grace/Or with a skill more marvellous and rare..."    
Hydrophobia  ~  an unfortunate scene took place in the High Street in Tilling when Paddy, the lean Irish terrier owned by Diva Plaistow, snatched a rabbit from the shopping basket of Elizabeth Mapp-Flint and played with it "very prettily."   He tossed the bunny in the air and lay down with a paw on each side of him, growling in a menacing manner as he pretended to worry him (assuming that the rabbit was male.)  Not surprisingly, a dispute ensued between the highly strung ladies concerned until Diva said "Oh well, it'll do for the kitchen" and put it in her basket.    
Elizabeth responded, "Diva, dear, don't let your servants eat it.  As likely as not it will give them hydrophobia"      
Originating from the Greek hudor, water and phobos, fear, hydrophobia  is fear or horror of water or inability to swallow it owing to a contraction of the throat.This is a symptom of rabies and has come to refer to rabies itself.   
Hyperion ~  Daisy Quantock was livid with rage when she heard that the Guru had fled after stealing many valuables from Lucia, Georgie and herself, including her spoons, forks and Georgian tankard.  Her passion like Hyperion's had lifted her upon her feet and she stood there defying the whole of the advanced class, short and stout and wholly ridiculous, but with some revolutionary menace about her. 
One of the twelve Titans/Titanes of Ancient Greece, Hyperion (Greek: the high one, watcher from above/ he who goes above) was the son of Ouranos (Heaven) and Gaia (Earth) and brother of Koios, Krios and Iapetos and the lord of light and the Titan of the east.   The four brothers represented the four pillars that held the sky or universe aloft. Legend has it that Hyperion  conspired with his brothers and Kronos in the castration of their father (with a sickle).They were eventually deposed by Zeus and cast into the pit of Tartaros, which Hesiod describes as a void located beneath the foundation of all where earth, heaven and sky have their roots. According to Pindar and Aeschylus, they were eventually released through the clemency of Zeus.  As a classicist, Benson was well-acquainted with the activities of this dysfunctional family.   
Hypocausts ~ when Lucia moved into "Mallards" and ordered the cellars to be cleared of debris, she examined the revealed floor level carefully with an electric torch, discovering that there were lines of brickwork lying at an angle to the rest of the floor. The moment she saw tham she was convinced that ther was a Roman look about them and secretly suspected that a Roman villa must once have stood there. She sent to the London Library for a few standard books on Roman remains in southern England and read an article during lunch-time in Georgie's Encyclopaedia about hypocausts (Latin: hypocaustum, which were ancient Roman sytems of underfloor heating. The word literally means "heat from below" from the Greek hypo (below/underneath) and kaiein, to burn or light a fire.)


Christopher Gray said...

Does any one know why the 'Hastings Chronicle' becomes the 'Hampshire Gazette' in 'Trouble for Lucia?

Deryck Solomon said...

I had noticed this too! I always found both titles irritating since Tilling, like Rye, should in any event clearly be in Sussex. I'm pretty sure it's just an oversight and should really go into the "Infelicities" in the Glossary. In the same vein, it struck me that Lucia is stated to be the cousin of Aggie Sandeman and later that Aggie is the cousin of the titled Adele Brixton. I think this technically must make Lucia a cousin of Adele Brixton too. If this was so, Lucia would certainly have made much of it -given her propensity for social climbing. Perhaps both issues shoud be entered as "Quasi -infelicities" or whatever the term is for "the cusp of infelicity".

Anonymous said...

Hospital Fete -
No, Major Benjy was Henry VIII; Georgie was Beau Brumell; Lucia was (famously) Britannia.
With Georgie and Lucia, don't get confused with the Elizabethan Fete at Risholme!

Peter said...

Hospital Fete:

Tableaux -

No, Major Benjy was Henry VIII. Georgie was Beau Brummell and Lucia was (famously) Britannia.

With Georgie and Lucia, don't get confused with the Elizabethan Fete at Riseholme!

Deryck Solomon said...

Peter (and Anonymous, if not one and the same). Thank you for looking at the Glossary. My entry here is intended to cover what transpires at the fete in the garden of Mallards in Tilling in Chapter 5 of "Mapp and Lucia". On pp 126 and 127 of the Black Swan edition Major Benjy is referred to as King Cophetua: "that is why he had a crown". Lucia was again Gloriana and Georgie reprised his Drake (which is why Lucia told Georgie to send to Riseholme "for his Drake clothes" - p.108)I do hope that's correct - if not, please let me know

Peter said...

Not sure why, but yes, I seem to have been both Peter and Anonymous. I think it might have been because at first I seemed unsuccessful in proving that I wasn't a robot!

I suspect too that I'm at fault because I was prompted by recently re-watching the TV version - and the series wasn't always particular about sticking to every single detail in the books.

Thank you for reminding me. I have the complete Black Swan series of books and I must obviously go back and read them again!